Jun 30, 2009
What Emily Just Did
In List Form.
- Went to La Casa Pateeta this last weekend. Mom is doing well. Is losing eyebrows and eyelashes in addition to already bald head, but it also losing tumors. Fair trade?
- Took Emily swimming with arm floaties. Chickenshit child actual floated by herself, around the pool. Was proud of her.
- Girlfriend stole bigger floatie that Gramma bought child and proceeded to fall off of it several times, bringing gales of laughter from child.
- I got slight color. Meaning that I can't be so bold as to use the word "tan" because that would just be a lie. But there are parts of me that are less white now.
- I did not get burnt. At all.
- Place of employment is doing program entitled "Get Active." General idea is a Biggest Loser type of thing, but slightly different. Requires two weekly hikes and one weekly challenge. Hiked two miles yesterday on lunch break. Now, my knees hurt.
- Going on childfree vacation this weekend. Maybe vacation is too large of a word. It will be four days in the heat and sun without my child. She will be at The Girlfriend's mother's house. Am excited. Am also worried that lots of vacation will be spent missing her. Maybe not, since I will also be drunk. Although that might make me miss her more. Note to self: don't get drunk and sappy.
- Had to interupt blog entry to poop! Pooping is good. However, why does that urge come on AFTER a shower? My butt smelled pleasantly of pomegranite mango, thank you very much. Oh well.
- Just looked at clock. Have to end blog entry. Will try to make more before vacation. If not, will come back with pictures. Or not. Will definitely miss the child though.
- Took Emily swimming with arm floaties. Chickenshit child actual floated by herself, around the pool. Was proud of her.
- Girlfriend stole bigger floatie that Gramma bought child and proceeded to fall off of it several times, bringing gales of laughter from child.
- I got slight color. Meaning that I can't be so bold as to use the word "tan" because that would just be a lie. But there are parts of me that are less white now.
- I did not get burnt. At all.
- Place of employment is doing program entitled "Get Active." General idea is a Biggest Loser type of thing, but slightly different. Requires two weekly hikes and one weekly challenge. Hiked two miles yesterday on lunch break. Now, my knees hurt.
- Going on childfree vacation this weekend. Maybe vacation is too large of a word. It will be four days in the heat and sun without my child. She will be at The Girlfriend's mother's house. Am excited. Am also worried that lots of vacation will be spent missing her. Maybe not, since I will also be drunk. Although that might make me miss her more. Note to self: don't get drunk and sappy.
- Had to interupt blog entry to poop! Pooping is good. However, why does that urge come on AFTER a shower? My butt smelled pleasantly of pomegranite mango, thank you very much. Oh well.
- Just looked at clock. Have to end blog entry. Will try to make more before vacation. If not, will come back with pictures. Or not. Will definitely miss the child though.
Jun 25, 2009
Oh To Live In Arizona.
They didn't pass the smoking in cars thing, which is GOOD. So hopefully now they can begin educating people and parents in particular on the damage of second hand smoke in children.
They did however pass new abortion laws. I updated about them a few weeks ago, and I am dismayed. I wish I had the money to fight it, to be on Jan Brewer's doorstep begging her to reconsider signing this in to law. But I can't.
Work this week has been outrageous. Someone has been sick, so we've all been pitching in, and it's tiring. Thus the lack of posting. And I promised myself I was going to sit down and post tonight and now, I just don't have the energy.
Sorry, internets. I need to get the baby in the tub.
They did however pass new abortion laws. I updated about them a few weeks ago, and I am dismayed. I wish I had the money to fight it, to be on Jan Brewer's doorstep begging her to reconsider signing this in to law. But I can't.
Work this week has been outrageous. Someone has been sick, so we've all been pitching in, and it's tiring. Thus the lack of posting. And I promised myself I was going to sit down and post tonight and now, I just don't have the energy.
Sorry, internets. I need to get the baby in the tub.
Jun 21, 2009
In Which I Fail At Parenting. And Ninja Skills.
So Emily has this one pajama outfit. It was handed down to us by a friend. The pants are pink with large blue, white and light pink polka-dots and the top is pink sleeves with a huge smiling Minnie Mouse on it. She LOVES these pajamas. And I allow her that love, because her pajamas and her underwear are really the only place I don't mind characters splashed around like nobodies business.
Well, she outgrew these pajamas about, oh, a year ago. But she continues to wear them. They get washed constantly because she'll put them on. She doesn't care that the shirt doesn't even go down to her belly button anymore, let alone provide any actual belly coverage. The pants are forced up and pretty much sausage her thighs, with the bottom of the pant legs coming to right beneath her shins. The amount of growing she has done in the last year is pretty amazing. Anyway.
I weed out clothing when I do laundry. When her clothes are fresh out of the drier and I'm folding/hanging and putting them away, I separate what doesn't fit anymore and what could probably get a few more wears out of them. There is a stack that sits on top of her rubbermaid underwear/socks/undershirts drawer set and when the stack is too tall to stand without leaning, I take it to the Awesome Neighbors house because they have a daughter who's about ten months younger than Emily, and of a much smaller build. So when Emily is bursting out of seams, their daughter gets the clothes which, more often than not, have a few weeks of bagginess to them. It works rather well actually.
Anyway. The Minnie pajamas have made it to the stack about six times. And every time they make it to the stack, Emily FLIPS HER SHIT. She grabs them, toppling the stack over and clutches them to her chest with angry defiance. I let her win, because there's part of me that thinks it's endearing that this particular pair of pajamas is her favorite. Because she has no particular connection to Minnie Mouse. Emily is all about the princesses, Tinkerbell, and Hannah Montana. However, the last time I saw her in the pajamas I decided that it is Time For Them To Go. I figured out though, that if she ever saw the neighbor's daughter in them that Emily would have her heart broken. Since the pajamas are now very worn, I decided to just toss them. Which I am normally against. But I don't want her to see them at Goodwill, or on the Awesome Neighbor's daughter, or anywhere else on anyone else in any way, shape, or form.
So I put them in the trash can while she's outside playing, under a carton of milk and a cardboard box. I glance at The Girlfriend and whisper "don't tell her!" and walk away, mission accomplished.
A few hours later, which happened to be about twenty minutes ago, The Girlfriend and I are sitting on the couch, innocently watching some TV while Emily takes care of her dinner dishes when Emily walks up to me with a handful of clothing. Her arm is stuck straight out and her eyebrows are hitting my ceiling as she looks at me like, um, HELLO? DO YOU KNOW WHAT THIS IS? BECAUSE I DO!
I calmly say, hey kid, what's up?
And she responds "Um, Mom? These were in the trash. Did you know that? Because they were because I just pulled them out."
I say, well, um, I must've-
to get interrupted with "They're my favorite Momma, don't DROP THEM AGAIN BECAUSE I LOVE THEM BECAUSE THEY'RE MY FAVORITE."
And she walks away, shaking her head at her mother's apparent stupidity and puts them in the fold pile on top of the drier.
Yeah. Fail.
Well, she outgrew these pajamas about, oh, a year ago. But she continues to wear them. They get washed constantly because she'll put them on. She doesn't care that the shirt doesn't even go down to her belly button anymore, let alone provide any actual belly coverage. The pants are forced up and pretty much sausage her thighs, with the bottom of the pant legs coming to right beneath her shins. The amount of growing she has done in the last year is pretty amazing. Anyway.
I weed out clothing when I do laundry. When her clothes are fresh out of the drier and I'm folding/hanging and putting them away, I separate what doesn't fit anymore and what could probably get a few more wears out of them. There is a stack that sits on top of her rubbermaid underwear/socks/undershirts drawer set and when the stack is too tall to stand without leaning, I take it to the Awesome Neighbors house because they have a daughter who's about ten months younger than Emily, and of a much smaller build. So when Emily is bursting out of seams, their daughter gets the clothes which, more often than not, have a few weeks of bagginess to them. It works rather well actually.
Anyway. The Minnie pajamas have made it to the stack about six times. And every time they make it to the stack, Emily FLIPS HER SHIT. She grabs them, toppling the stack over and clutches them to her chest with angry defiance. I let her win, because there's part of me that thinks it's endearing that this particular pair of pajamas is her favorite. Because she has no particular connection to Minnie Mouse. Emily is all about the princesses, Tinkerbell, and Hannah Montana. However, the last time I saw her in the pajamas I decided that it is Time For Them To Go. I figured out though, that if she ever saw the neighbor's daughter in them that Emily would have her heart broken. Since the pajamas are now very worn, I decided to just toss them. Which I am normally against. But I don't want her to see them at Goodwill, or on the Awesome Neighbor's daughter, or anywhere else on anyone else in any way, shape, or form.
So I put them in the trash can while she's outside playing, under a carton of milk and a cardboard box. I glance at The Girlfriend and whisper "don't tell her!" and walk away, mission accomplished.
A few hours later, which happened to be about twenty minutes ago, The Girlfriend and I are sitting on the couch, innocently watching some TV while Emily takes care of her dinner dishes when Emily walks up to me with a handful of clothing. Her arm is stuck straight out and her eyebrows are hitting my ceiling as she looks at me like, um, HELLO? DO YOU KNOW WHAT THIS IS? BECAUSE I DO!
I calmly say, hey kid, what's up?
And she responds "Um, Mom? These were in the trash. Did you know that? Because they were because I just pulled them out."
I say, well, um, I must've-
to get interrupted with "They're my favorite Momma, don't DROP THEM AGAIN BECAUSE I LOVE THEM BECAUSE THEY'RE MY FAVORITE."
And she walks away, shaking her head at her mother's apparent stupidity and puts them in the fold pile on top of the drier.
Yeah. Fail.
Jun 19, 2009
Tangentially,
Well because the last post was just BUZZING with differences of opinions, healthy debate and funny hatecomments, I've decided to put my opinion down.
I'm talking about a recent vote to make smoking in the car with minors illegal. Now. In general, I think it's a good idea to do your best as a parent to protect your child from things that can hurt them. I think that includes second hand smoke. Children don't have an option to get away from the smoke from cigarettes and, yes, I think that parents who hot box their children are doing their children a disservice, especially with all of the data available about the effects of continual second hand smoke.
Now, with that said, here is my opinion: I think it is an incredibly slippery slope to be sliding on. The slope being a slop that begins to define what one can do in their personally, privately owned vehicle with their own children. I also feel that if this is put in to effect that many other laws need to be put in effect as well. Laws like "If you have children, you can't watch porn in the house." That one's from the girlfriend. And I know how ridiculous that is, but that's what needs to be thought about. If they can tell me I can't smoke in my vehicle, then they had better be paying for my vehicle. As long as I am paying, I can do what I want.
I don't smoke in the car with Emily, as a rule. I think it's gross and I don't want her to be the kid that smells like smoke. And yeah, health concerns blah blah blah. However, my reasons don't matter. I don't smoke with her in the car. And I think parents who do need to learn some facts about the dangers of it, and realize what they're doing to their children. But. It's my car, and it's my child. Therefore it is my choice.
I know that seems ignorant, that there are people who think this is a wonderful law and I'll say that I think it comes from a good place. But there are all sorts of things one shouldn't do in a vehicle (put makeup on, eat, get in to a song, talk, sign documents, groom animals, etc...) but they do. I saw a woman TWEEZING HER EYEBROWS at a stop light. Surely that's dangerous. And if she hit my car and killed my daughter, I'm sure Arizona would write a law against the use of tweezers in vehicles. So, again, I think this law comes from a good place. But I think that it's a dangerous starting point. I think that once we begin telling people what they can and cannot do with their possessions, clothing, and bodies, that we are transforming from a nation that is built on the freedom to make choices, even if they're bad choices, to a nation built on the notion that common sense doesn't exist.
And then I type that and find myself thinking, well, we DON'T have much common sense as a nation. What kind of person needs to be warned not to use a chain saw near their genitals, or not to throw a lit cigarette in to a pile of brush in fire season, or not to leave a child unattended in a walker at the top of a staircase? Who are we that we need these dire warnings and rules? Where did common sense go? I know that I have it, that I employ the use of it all the time when weighing my parenting decisions, my driving decisions, my grocery decisions. So why can I, and why can't other people? Why, especially, are parents not allowed to use common sense both from the law and from the demands of online parenting communities?
I once posted that I leave Emmy in the tub. She's three years old, NEVER SHUTS UP, and I go to the next room with both doors open and fold laundry while she sings. It's not like I leave her in there, hop in my car, go party for two hours and then come back. When I posted this I got 100+ comments about what an awful parent I am and that I deserve to see my daughter drown. Really? Because I'm pretty sure that in actuality I'm a single mom who has to fold the clothes, a mom that has taught her child that the bathroom rule is that you have to keep singing if you want your "piracy" and that at some point, one needs to give their child some room to learn some lessons.
That's probably a bad example, and there's probably someone whose cousin's boyfriend's mom's best friend left her daughter alone in the bathtub when she was nine years old for thirty seconds and came back in to find her daughter blue because she slipped and drowned in a half an inch of water. And if that happened to you, or your cousin's boyfriend's mom's best friend's daughter, I am very sorry. But for me, it works. It does. And for me, vaccinations work, and spankings work, and all sorts of things work. Leashes don't work for me.
I don't know what this all has to do with each other. I don't. I know that I suck at staying on topic (which is maybe why no one comments, even though I average about forty readers a day, come on people). I know that I am angry that rights seem to be taken away left and right and NO ONE CARES because it's in the name of safety. If this country is really worried about our kids, why don't we make fast food illegal? Start regulating our food industry and really start educating about the dangers of unsafe sex?
Hell, let's make a mandatory park that has checkin via fingerprint, eye scan and a drop of blood from both parent and child, a park that requires kids to work out for an hour a day? Why don't we try prohibition again? Because drunks are pretty fucking dangerous, don't you think? I know that drunk drivers are, yet people like http://sports.espn.go.com/nfl/news/story?id=4262751 are let off with a 30 day sentence because of deep pockets. Why don't we just go ahead and ban conversation, because you never know when some kid will overhear something that will damage their minds. And shit, while we're at it, we can just get rid of parents all together, because those damn parents just fuck their kids up. Right?
It's part of life to fuck up, to make mistakes and learn from them, and while it's a parents' job to make good decision, they do have the RIGHT to make those decisions. They do.
I'm too angry to finish this. Not about smoking in cars, because like I said, I don't think one should smoke with kids around when it can be avoided. But about the impossible state of our country.
So excuse me while I go put twenty cigarettes in Emily's mouth, light them simultaneously and then laugh while I teach her to smoke twenty at a time.
I'm talking about a recent vote to make smoking in the car with minors illegal. Now. In general, I think it's a good idea to do your best as a parent to protect your child from things that can hurt them. I think that includes second hand smoke. Children don't have an option to get away from the smoke from cigarettes and, yes, I think that parents who hot box their children are doing their children a disservice, especially with all of the data available about the effects of continual second hand smoke.
Now, with that said, here is my opinion: I think it is an incredibly slippery slope to be sliding on. The slope being a slop that begins to define what one can do in their personally, privately owned vehicle with their own children. I also feel that if this is put in to effect that many other laws need to be put in effect as well. Laws like "If you have children, you can't watch porn in the house." That one's from the girlfriend. And I know how ridiculous that is, but that's what needs to be thought about. If they can tell me I can't smoke in my vehicle, then they had better be paying for my vehicle. As long as I am paying, I can do what I want.
I don't smoke in the car with Emily, as a rule. I think it's gross and I don't want her to be the kid that smells like smoke. And yeah, health concerns blah blah blah. However, my reasons don't matter. I don't smoke with her in the car. And I think parents who do need to learn some facts about the dangers of it, and realize what they're doing to their children. But. It's my car, and it's my child. Therefore it is my choice.
I know that seems ignorant, that there are people who think this is a wonderful law and I'll say that I think it comes from a good place. But there are all sorts of things one shouldn't do in a vehicle (put makeup on, eat, get in to a song, talk, sign documents, groom animals, etc...) but they do. I saw a woman TWEEZING HER EYEBROWS at a stop light. Surely that's dangerous. And if she hit my car and killed my daughter, I'm sure Arizona would write a law against the use of tweezers in vehicles. So, again, I think this law comes from a good place. But I think that it's a dangerous starting point. I think that once we begin telling people what they can and cannot do with their possessions, clothing, and bodies, that we are transforming from a nation that is built on the freedom to make choices, even if they're bad choices, to a nation built on the notion that common sense doesn't exist.
And then I type that and find myself thinking, well, we DON'T have much common sense as a nation. What kind of person needs to be warned not to use a chain saw near their genitals, or not to throw a lit cigarette in to a pile of brush in fire season, or not to leave a child unattended in a walker at the top of a staircase? Who are we that we need these dire warnings and rules? Where did common sense go? I know that I have it, that I employ the use of it all the time when weighing my parenting decisions, my driving decisions, my grocery decisions. So why can I, and why can't other people? Why, especially, are parents not allowed to use common sense both from the law and from the demands of online parenting communities?
I once posted that I leave Emmy in the tub. She's three years old, NEVER SHUTS UP, and I go to the next room with both doors open and fold laundry while she sings. It's not like I leave her in there, hop in my car, go party for two hours and then come back. When I posted this I got 100+ comments about what an awful parent I am and that I deserve to see my daughter drown. Really? Because I'm pretty sure that in actuality I'm a single mom who has to fold the clothes, a mom that has taught her child that the bathroom rule is that you have to keep singing if you want your "piracy" and that at some point, one needs to give their child some room to learn some lessons.
That's probably a bad example, and there's probably someone whose cousin's boyfriend's mom's best friend left her daughter alone in the bathtub when she was nine years old for thirty seconds and came back in to find her daughter blue because she slipped and drowned in a half an inch of water. And if that happened to you, or your cousin's boyfriend's mom's best friend's daughter, I am very sorry. But for me, it works. It does. And for me, vaccinations work, and spankings work, and all sorts of things work. Leashes don't work for me.
I don't know what this all has to do with each other. I don't. I know that I suck at staying on topic (which is maybe why no one comments, even though I average about forty readers a day, come on people). I know that I am angry that rights seem to be taken away left and right and NO ONE CARES because it's in the name of safety. If this country is really worried about our kids, why don't we make fast food illegal? Start regulating our food industry and really start educating about the dangers of unsafe sex?
Hell, let's make a mandatory park that has checkin via fingerprint, eye scan and a drop of blood from both parent and child, a park that requires kids to work out for an hour a day? Why don't we try prohibition again? Because drunks are pretty fucking dangerous, don't you think? I know that drunk drivers are, yet people like http://sports.espn.go.com/nfl/news/story?id=4262751 are let off with a 30 day sentence because of deep pockets. Why don't we just go ahead and ban conversation, because you never know when some kid will overhear something that will damage their minds. And shit, while we're at it, we can just get rid of parents all together, because those damn parents just fuck their kids up. Right?
It's part of life to fuck up, to make mistakes and learn from them, and while it's a parents' job to make good decision, they do have the RIGHT to make those decisions. They do.
I'm too angry to finish this. Not about smoking in cars, because like I said, I don't think one should smoke with kids around when it can be avoided. But about the impossible state of our country.
So excuse me while I go put twenty cigarettes in Emily's mouth, light them simultaneously and then laugh while I teach her to smoke twenty at a time.
Jun 18, 2009
Opinions?
The people in charge in Arizona are voting on making smoking illegal if there are any minors in a vehicle. They want to make it a non-moving violation and charge $50 per minor if caught.
I have a lot of thoughts on this, but am curious about others' opinions as well. So, discuss!
Jun 16, 2009
Nostalgia?
This is an old picture. Emmy was probably, I don't know, a year and a half? Somewhere around there. Honestly, some days I miss it a lot. Things were far less complicated. However, I wouldn't trade the comic relief of three for the tantrums of fifteen months at all. The communication upgrade makes the previous model less admirable too.
But still. Some days, I ache for those days. I wish I had been as happy then as I am now, because I'm curious if it would have shed a different light on that period for me.
Aren't we cute?
But still. Some days, I ache for those days. I wish I had been as happy then as I am now, because I'm curious if it would have shed a different light on that period for me.
Aren't we cute?
Jun 14, 2009
So.
I went to pride yesterday with The Girlfriend and it was, way different than the pride that I'm used to. The last pride I went to was in Chicago and it is a HUGE event. With police and protesters and over the top everything.
Here, there is a park that is gated off and there are two stages, a main stage for the drag queens and a smaller stage for some more local, less known acts. Yesterday, the highlight was a band called The Pubes (you can see their myspace here.) And they were awesome enough that I gave them seven of my dollars for a CD.
We walked around with my friend Sarah for awhile, got some overpriced beer, and then later went to a goodbye party for a friend at work. It was a very chill day.
I need to explain that life happens. I know that everyone knows this, that life happens and gets in the way of things like regular family emails, sending pictures to loved ones, making time for friends, and updating blogs. I do apologize for it though. So this update is to keep this thing updated. I love this blog, greatly. But this year so far has been hectic to say the least.
It began with a trip to Chicago to see my family and Alan. But this was no ordinary visit home, oh no. It was the visit that involved my dad meeting The Girlfriend. Which turned out fantastically well, but was stressful nonetheless. Three weeks later, I had to drop out of school due to financial difficulties and Emily had her birthday and my mom began going to the hospital for arthritis pain. The next month, my Grandfather died, I moved out of my apartment, moved in to a new place with The Girlfriend and, in the middle of moving The Girlfriend's old apartment to this one, had to make an emergency trip to my mom's neck of the woods when scans from her arthritis pain led to the discovery of ovarian cancer. Some of my other family was spiraling in to their own negativity and it involved my brothers. In April, the move was final and we had to deal with all sorts of maintenance issues, and my mom started chemo. May, things started calming down and then I got slammed with a money/legal issue that I don't care to go in to until it's over, and then, June, I got excited for the nice weather and my mom had a heart attack.
Now, the heart attack's over, I should be back in school by August, I'm settled in to my new home. I'm young and in love, and really, who needs more than that? I know exactly how blessed I am that I have my mom, my girlfriend, my daughter, my dad, and my friends. But. In six months, my life has turned upside down. So I sit at this computer to update things and don't know how to update anything with the lightheartedness that I want this blog to have. And I guess that's it: my life isn't lighthearted all the time. So, readers, I hope you're prepared for honesty. It may not be pretty. But I will begin updating more. I hope that you'll still read, and maybe learn from the things I'm doing in my life.
For now, I need to go lie down.
Goodnight.
Here, there is a park that is gated off and there are two stages, a main stage for the drag queens and a smaller stage for some more local, less known acts. Yesterday, the highlight was a band called The Pubes (you can see their myspace here.) And they were awesome enough that I gave them seven of my dollars for a CD.
We walked around with my friend Sarah for awhile, got some overpriced beer, and then later went to a goodbye party for a friend at work. It was a very chill day.
I need to explain that life happens. I know that everyone knows this, that life happens and gets in the way of things like regular family emails, sending pictures to loved ones, making time for friends, and updating blogs. I do apologize for it though. So this update is to keep this thing updated. I love this blog, greatly. But this year so far has been hectic to say the least.
It began with a trip to Chicago to see my family and Alan. But this was no ordinary visit home, oh no. It was the visit that involved my dad meeting The Girlfriend. Which turned out fantastically well, but was stressful nonetheless. Three weeks later, I had to drop out of school due to financial difficulties and Emily had her birthday and my mom began going to the hospital for arthritis pain. The next month, my Grandfather died, I moved out of my apartment, moved in to a new place with The Girlfriend and, in the middle of moving The Girlfriend's old apartment to this one, had to make an emergency trip to my mom's neck of the woods when scans from her arthritis pain led to the discovery of ovarian cancer. Some of my other family was spiraling in to their own negativity and it involved my brothers. In April, the move was final and we had to deal with all sorts of maintenance issues, and my mom started chemo. May, things started calming down and then I got slammed with a money/legal issue that I don't care to go in to until it's over, and then, June, I got excited for the nice weather and my mom had a heart attack.
Now, the heart attack's over, I should be back in school by August, I'm settled in to my new home. I'm young and in love, and really, who needs more than that? I know exactly how blessed I am that I have my mom, my girlfriend, my daughter, my dad, and my friends. But. In six months, my life has turned upside down. So I sit at this computer to update things and don't know how to update anything with the lightheartedness that I want this blog to have. And I guess that's it: my life isn't lighthearted all the time. So, readers, I hope you're prepared for honesty. It may not be pretty. But I will begin updating more. I hope that you'll still read, and maybe learn from the things I'm doing in my life.
For now, I need to go lie down.
Goodnight.
Jun 12, 2009
ohmygod the talking.
Emmy: Hey mom our car is white and i love our car because it is white and that truck? That truck over there? It's yellow and I don't like it but if you had a yellow car I'd like it because it would be like the sun but that yellow is like pee-pee hahahahahaha I said pee-pee. Mom I have to go pee but I know I have to wait because we DON'T PEE IN THE CAR and I know better because only babies pee in the car and Momma, I want a sister but I want her to stay cute and like a baby and when she cries you can have her but when she's happy I'll hold her and change her diaper and we BE GENTLE WITH BABIES and Mom, that yellow car really does look like pee. Pee. Pee. PEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE. Pee. Pee. I really have to go peeeee-eeeeee-eeee. But I can wait, Mom, Mom, I'm singing. Can you hear me? It's a song about pee. I'm singing like Hannah Montana because I'm like her look at my sunglasses! They're pink! Hannah would like them and so would her dad, Billy Ray Cyrus because he looooooooves Hannah when she's Hannah or Miley and he would looooooooove me and Momma, why wouldn't you buy me that Hannah cereal? Because it looked really cool and i really reeeeeeeaaaaallly wanted it and you wouldn't buy it and it made me sad like when I fell and got a bloody nose because I was running in the parking lot and WE DON'T RUN IN PARKING LOTS Mom, because we'll fall and get a bloody nose and get hitted by a car and then I'll died and you'll flush me down the toilet and I don't think i'd really like that.
I didn't like when we flushed Charlie (her old fish) down the toilet and now I have Goose and he's such a good fish because he swims and I don't want to flush Goose down the toilet because he's not died and Mom! I'm having a sleepover tomorrow! At the Awesome Neighbors! Because you love me and need grownup time with The Girlfriend and you guys are gonna KISS and HUG and KISS some more because you love her and you love me too Mommy, and why are so many cars yellow? And why can't we go to the park? I know it's windy but I really want to go and maybe tomorrow we can go and tomorrow I'll have breakfast and I want pink yogurt and I want to wear my princess dress when I eat it and Mommy, how old are you? Why is your hair the way it is? I have dark hair and so do you! I love dark hair! It's cool. I don't like light hair. Except on Auntie. Because Auntie is soooo pretty and I miss her and she moveded away and I miss her but those cats of hers kept trying to steal my crayons! And Mommy I want Auntie to come sleep over because I love her and we can do hair pretties and she lets me eat all the fruit snacks, but I have to LEARN TO SAY NO to the candy all because it makes my tummy hurt and I threw up at Walmart and The Girlfriend had to buy me a new shirt and I was smelly and no one wanted to be near me because I was smelly because I ate too much candy so I have to say no. Right Mommy?
Me: Um, yes. Too much candy makes you sick and-
Emmy: I know. It hurts my tummy and doesn't give me muscles. My vitamins give me muscles and they taste so yummy and I want a vitamin right now because they're good for me and I love them. Mommy, why is my carseat pink? I love pink. But purple's my favorite. And I like green because you do and Mommy? When will we be home? When we get home I want to go play in my room and listen to music and read my books and I want to dance around all crazy because I'm a kid and I can because I'm a kid and that's what kids can do but not grownups because grownups have to make money and you can't make money dancing, can you?
Me: Um...
Emmy: If i could make money dancing then I TOTALLY WOULD because it's soo much fun and it makes my body feel crazy and I love the music and Mommy? Can we listen to No One because I want to SIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINGGGGGGG.
And I promptly turned on Alicia Keys and cranked the volume. The talking OHMYGOD with the WORDS and the moving of the mouth and the talking, she talks, the talker with all the talking, yes, she belongs to me and OHMYGOD SHE'S STILL TALKING.
I didn't like when we flushed Charlie (her old fish) down the toilet and now I have Goose and he's such a good fish because he swims and I don't want to flush Goose down the toilet because he's not died and Mom! I'm having a sleepover tomorrow! At the Awesome Neighbors! Because you love me and need grownup time with The Girlfriend and you guys are gonna KISS and HUG and KISS some more because you love her and you love me too Mommy, and why are so many cars yellow? And why can't we go to the park? I know it's windy but I really want to go and maybe tomorrow we can go and tomorrow I'll have breakfast and I want pink yogurt and I want to wear my princess dress when I eat it and Mommy, how old are you? Why is your hair the way it is? I have dark hair and so do you! I love dark hair! It's cool. I don't like light hair. Except on Auntie. Because Auntie is soooo pretty and I miss her and she moveded away and I miss her but those cats of hers kept trying to steal my crayons! And Mommy I want Auntie to come sleep over because I love her and we can do hair pretties and she lets me eat all the fruit snacks, but I have to LEARN TO SAY NO to the candy all because it makes my tummy hurt and I threw up at Walmart and The Girlfriend had to buy me a new shirt and I was smelly and no one wanted to be near me because I was smelly because I ate too much candy so I have to say no. Right Mommy?
Me: Um, yes. Too much candy makes you sick and-
Emmy: I know. It hurts my tummy and doesn't give me muscles. My vitamins give me muscles and they taste so yummy and I want a vitamin right now because they're good for me and I love them. Mommy, why is my carseat pink? I love pink. But purple's my favorite. And I like green because you do and Mommy? When will we be home? When we get home I want to go play in my room and listen to music and read my books and I want to dance around all crazy because I'm a kid and I can because I'm a kid and that's what kids can do but not grownups because grownups have to make money and you can't make money dancing, can you?
Me: Um...
Emmy: If i could make money dancing then I TOTALLY WOULD because it's soo much fun and it makes my body feel crazy and I love the music and Mommy? Can we listen to No One because I want to SIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINGGGGGGG.
And I promptly turned on Alicia Keys and cranked the volume. The talking OHMYGOD with the WORDS and the moving of the mouth and the talking, she talks, the talker with all the talking, yes, she belongs to me and OHMYGOD SHE'S STILL TALKING.
Jun 10, 2009
The Last Two Weekends, In Pictures.
I was inspired by one of my favorite blogs (flotsamblog.com), so am jumpstarting my post about the lake (and I know, I KNOW it was two weeks ago. I know. Remember that thing i said about deadlines? Yes? Ok.) by posting pictures. I am also posting a few pictures from camping last weekend.
So.
The Lake:
Of course the pictures aren't in any accurate order, and I had to not post most of them, because Emily's running around in her swimsuit. And while I'm all about blogging, I'm also from Chicago. And to me, you just don't post half-naked pictures of any children over a year. So, sorry.
So the lake was two weekends ago, and this last weekend, we went camping with the Awesome Neighbors to celebrate a birthday. Camping:
Ok. Time to go lie down on the couch and eat a hershey's hug. My uterus is in the process of falling out of my vagina, and it's a little exhausting.
So.
The Lake:
Of course the pictures aren't in any accurate order, and I had to not post most of them, because Emily's running around in her swimsuit. And while I'm all about blogging, I'm also from Chicago. And to me, you just don't post half-naked pictures of any children over a year. So, sorry.
So the lake was two weekends ago, and this last weekend, we went camping with the Awesome Neighbors to celebrate a birthday. Camping:
Ok. Time to go lie down on the couch and eat a hershey's hug. My uterus is in the process of falling out of my vagina, and it's a little exhausting.
Jun 8, 2009
Oh The Mondays
So that thing? In that movie? That movie that I love? A "case of the Mondays?" IS EXACTLY WHAT IS HAPPENING TODAY.
This has been one of the longest Mondays in a loooooong time. Yes, long enough to warrant five extra "o"s. I have this horrible habit in the mornings of not wanting to wake up. I never used to mind it, but now that my baby sleeps until I enter her room and peel her body from her blankets, now that my linens are regularly cleaned due to owning a washer and dryer, now that my bed is filled with the furnace that is my girlfriend, I don't like leaving the bed. It's not a mad rush to wake up and get the day over with, it's a love of groggily rolling over and kissing the shoulders of someone I love; an appreciation of a quiet house, clean and settled, safe and warm, a house that surely enough, has turned in to my home; a peace that settles over me, a knowing my baby is dreaming, starting to roll around and mumble, an assurance that I am safe and loved. And I'll admit that even though I love my job, I do wish I had more days in bed past five in the morning.
I rolled out of bed thirty minutes after the first alarm (4:55a) and realized I had no time for a shower. Because, you know, there's mandatory computer time in the morning and YES MY COMPUTER TIME IS USUALLY MORE IMPORTANT THAN A SHOWER. I read cnn.com, check the weather, check my email and facebook, and then I can go about my day.
I got to work and we had an incredibly busy day. This is a huge relief. Busy is waaay better than bored, and business enables me to have a job. But, it was a very long Monday. That's all I'll say about that.
So even though I didn't write about any lake adventures, I did update. This window has been open for two hours and tomorrow I have some legal matters that need to be taken care of. My mom should be home soon, and Emily loves to wiggle her butt.
I'll conclude with a conversation I had with Emily today on the car ride home:
Emmy: Mommy, how was your day at work?
Me: Rough, baby.
Emmy: That sucks.
Me: Yeah.
Emmy: Well, next weekend you can be a kid and The Girlfriend can be a kid and I'll be a grown-up, so remember, don't take your shoes off at school.
Me, laughing: Ok. What are you going to do when you're a grown-up?
Emmy: Work and make money and pick you up from school and hug you and kiss you and pick The Girlfriend up at school and make her mac and cheesearoni and watch her wiggle her butt and make more money and go shopping and watch a lot of Hannah Montana and never tell you it's tool late to watch Hannah Montana because I'll be the grown-up so YOU can go to bed and I'll watch Hannah Montana and eat mac and cheesearoni all night.
Me: ...
Emmy: That's how things should be, you know.
This has been one of the longest Mondays in a loooooong time. Yes, long enough to warrant five extra "o"s. I have this horrible habit in the mornings of not wanting to wake up. I never used to mind it, but now that my baby sleeps until I enter her room and peel her body from her blankets, now that my linens are regularly cleaned due to owning a washer and dryer, now that my bed is filled with the furnace that is my girlfriend, I don't like leaving the bed. It's not a mad rush to wake up and get the day over with, it's a love of groggily rolling over and kissing the shoulders of someone I love; an appreciation of a quiet house, clean and settled, safe and warm, a house that surely enough, has turned in to my home; a peace that settles over me, a knowing my baby is dreaming, starting to roll around and mumble, an assurance that I am safe and loved. And I'll admit that even though I love my job, I do wish I had more days in bed past five in the morning.
I rolled out of bed thirty minutes after the first alarm (4:55a) and realized I had no time for a shower. Because, you know, there's mandatory computer time in the morning and YES MY COMPUTER TIME IS USUALLY MORE IMPORTANT THAN A SHOWER. I read cnn.com, check the weather, check my email and facebook, and then I can go about my day.
I got to work and we had an incredibly busy day. This is a huge relief. Busy is waaay better than bored, and business enables me to have a job. But, it was a very long Monday. That's all I'll say about that.
So even though I didn't write about any lake adventures, I did update. This window has been open for two hours and tomorrow I have some legal matters that need to be taken care of. My mom should be home soon, and Emily loves to wiggle her butt.
I'll conclude with a conversation I had with Emily today on the car ride home:
Emmy: Mommy, how was your day at work?
Me: Rough, baby.
Emmy: That sucks.
Me: Yeah.
Emmy: Well, next weekend you can be a kid and The Girlfriend can be a kid and I'll be a grown-up, so remember, don't take your shoes off at school.
Me, laughing: Ok. What are you going to do when you're a grown-up?
Emmy: Work and make money and pick you up from school and hug you and kiss you and pick The Girlfriend up at school and make her mac and cheesearoni and watch her wiggle her butt and make more money and go shopping and watch a lot of Hannah Montana and never tell you it's tool late to watch Hannah Montana because I'll be the grown-up so YOU can go to bed and I'll watch Hannah Montana and eat mac and cheesearoni all night.
Me: ...
Emmy: That's how things should be, you know.
The Only Legal Form of Neglect.
I don't mean to neglect my readers, or my writing. I am grateful for the readers I have, and hope to get more.
My momma is in the hospital again. Nothing related to the cancer, but a pretty scary weekend anyway. I'm sure I'm not the only scared one. But, it's my mom. And I am scared.
Well, I was. Now, I'm better. And later today when I have more concrete details, I will be even better. But at the initial news, I was scared for her.
Anyway, duty calls and I have to go to work. It is a PROMISE though, that tonight I will update for real. Because the lake stories from last weekend are still in my head. And they're funny.
My momma is in the hospital again. Nothing related to the cancer, but a pretty scary weekend anyway. I'm sure I'm not the only scared one. But, it's my mom. And I am scared.
Well, I was. Now, I'm better. And later today when I have more concrete details, I will be even better. But at the initial news, I was scared for her.
Anyway, duty calls and I have to go to work. It is a PROMISE though, that tonight I will update for real. Because the lake stories from last weekend are still in my head. And they're funny.
Jun 4, 2009
Teaser
So as you can see, I suck with deadlines.
Until I actually have time to write about last weekend, which I really need to do before this weekend, as we're going camping again, here is one picture.
I forgot to make coffee last night.
Until I actually have time to write about last weekend, which I really need to do before this weekend, as we're going camping again, here is one picture.
I forgot to make coffee last night.
Jun 3, 2009
So In My Defense
I know I haven't updated. And the problem is the sunburn. On Saturday I got this crazy idea, this theory that I wanted to Get A Tan. So I applied spf 4 tanning lotion, the stuff The Girlfriend uses and laid out. For hours. When I got bored of laying out, I played with Emily. We played in the sand and the sun for hours. Then I would go back to reading. Finally, finally, I felt my shoulders get a little hot. So I let The Girlfriend put some spf 15 on them.
Well, I woke up with the entire backside of my body covered in horrendous burns. I was dizzy, nauseous, and found that my body couldn't find a temperature of comfort. Of course, on Sunday, we had to tear down camp. I helped. I cleaned out the tent.
Anyway, I got home with this sunburn from the devil and was still sick to my stomach. Mild case of sun poisoning? Some people will say that doesn't exist, and I have to give credit to that opinion. But I'm going to go ahead and use the term because it best fits what I felt like: that too much constant exposure had poisoned my body.
So. Monday was horrendous. I cried in the shower, I was at work trying not to move, (and I don't exactly work in an environment where that is possible), and I came home and didn't move from the couch.
Yesterday was better. Instead of every inch of my skin screaming, only my shoulders, lower back, butt and backs of my knees were screaming. And of course I helped my butt by falling down my stairs yesterday morning, so now a bruise is pretty likely to appear. (and let me tell you, rug burn doesn't exactly soothe a sunburn. yeah.)
So today, I woke up and I'm still sore (shoulders and backs of knees). But the soreness I can handle. I was able to take a shower without crying, I'm sitting here in my chair not in pain because of it, and blog, I have missed you these last couple days.
Tonight I will tell of our lake trip, Emily's first one. It may come in parts, as I have to keep shifting my butt, but it will begin tonight. With pictures!
Thanks for reading.
Well, I woke up with the entire backside of my body covered in horrendous burns. I was dizzy, nauseous, and found that my body couldn't find a temperature of comfort. Of course, on Sunday, we had to tear down camp. I helped. I cleaned out the tent.
Anyway, I got home with this sunburn from the devil and was still sick to my stomach. Mild case of sun poisoning? Some people will say that doesn't exist, and I have to give credit to that opinion. But I'm going to go ahead and use the term because it best fits what I felt like: that too much constant exposure had poisoned my body.
So. Monday was horrendous. I cried in the shower, I was at work trying not to move, (and I don't exactly work in an environment where that is possible), and I came home and didn't move from the couch.
Yesterday was better. Instead of every inch of my skin screaming, only my shoulders, lower back, butt and backs of my knees were screaming. And of course I helped my butt by falling down my stairs yesterday morning, so now a bruise is pretty likely to appear. (and let me tell you, rug burn doesn't exactly soothe a sunburn. yeah.)
So today, I woke up and I'm still sore (shoulders and backs of knees). But the soreness I can handle. I was able to take a shower without crying, I'm sitting here in my chair not in pain because of it, and blog, I have missed you these last couple days.
Tonight I will tell of our lake trip, Emily's first one. It may come in parts, as I have to keep shifting my butt, but it will begin tonight. With pictures!
Thanks for reading.
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