In Which I Review TV With No Qualification Whatsoever.

I watched the season premiere of Jon and Kate Plus 8 last night. It's never been a show that I watched religiously or anything, but I definitely enjoy it. It really helps me to see other moms being moms. Sometimes I feel like the task is so big, a task so big that there is no possible way I could possibly handle it. Watching Kate makes me feel a little better. Like, if she can handle eight kids, why can't I handle one?

That's a whole other post, for a whole different day. So. I was watching this premiere last night because I wanted to see what was going to happen. I'm sure that most people have seen him in the tabloids with accusations of cheating and the like. While I was watching this episode, my heart just kept breaking. Over and over they looped him saying "I can't be Jon. I have to be Jon and Kate Plus 8, and I still haven't gotten a grip on that." Every time he said that, I could feel my throat tighten.

I saw the paparazzi at the birthday party and thought that was just ridiculous. I saw them running around when Kate took her kids to the party supply store and I felt grateful that the kids probably don't know what they're there for. I saw Kate's face when her, Mady and Cara were filling goody bags alone. I got angry when Jon showed up at the party and hadn't lifted a finger.

But while I was watching, I kept thinking: these are real people. This is a real life they're living, with real kids, and real problems. What's wrong with Jon going to a bar once in a while? I go grab one beer after work, every Tuesday. Do I deserve to have my face splashed all over the place? Am I a bad parent? Am I a bad signifigant other? I mean, granted, we go together. But what about anything I do? If I were semi-famous and two guys asked to take a picture with me, I'd probably do it. I wouldn't know how to say no, especially if the limelight wasn't somewhere I was particularly comfortable. So if that picture got taken, would I then be a cheater? Of course not! I feel for him so much. I have a hard time with my one kid, he has EIGHT of them. His whole life, his whole world has flipped upside down. He is a stay-at-home parent and that is HARD. I can't think of any other job that might require a beer after hours. Except the hours never end.

And Kate, I understand why she does this show. I'm not in her head, I'm not in her shoes. But first, the TV show must generate a lot of money. If I had eight college funds to worry about? I would be doing everything I could. And not only eight college funds, but eight mouths to feed, sixteen feet that need shoes, six preemies that have the potential for a lot of problems. I understand that this is a way of documentation, and if it were me, it would be a constant test... a way to evaluate my parenthood. Also, with eight kids, you're GOING to miss out on moments. If they're taped, you can look back at them and maybe learn more about your kids and yourself.

I'm not saying that Jon didn't do anything. I'm not. I have no idea what their marriage is about, how they feel for one another, or the dynamics between them and how they may have changed. However. I do know a little about relationships. And honestly, I admire the both of them for getting up there on TV and talkign about it. It made me so sad to watch, so sad to see these people that used to light up when they saw eachother, to see them falling apart. But. Would you have the courage to talk about it? To face the rumors? I don't know that I would. I think I might be too scared. And their kids will see this one day. They are being real for their children, and they love their children.

Some say they asked for this limelight, this life, but I don't think they did. I'm sure that even though I read tabloids sometimes, I have NO idea what it's truly like to be a celebrity. To have people outside my home, to have more to protect my children against, more to teach them about, more caution to take than I already have. I think that they began this show because they wanted to document it. They believed that their children, and their relative health, was miraculous. They wanted to let the world take a peek in. It's not their fault that the world fell in love with them. Has Jon been in the wrong place at the wrong time? Maybe. Has Kate neglected her marriage for her public image? Maybe. Who knows? Not me.

But I will stick to my admiration of their heart, their joint parenting efforts (although, come on Jon. Pick it up a little bit.), and their effort at divulging the reality of the situation. I've read that it looked like they were uncomfortable. And they did! But, wouldn't you be? Can you imagine their lives? Can you imagine haveing SIX FIVE-YEAR-OLDS? I can't. I would go crazy! If I got caught at one bar one time, or with one wrong person at one wrong time, I'd consider myself blessed.

I'm curious how the season will play out. I am. But what I hope is that they can find some middle. That maybe Jon can go back to work and Kate can tone it down a little. That the kids see their parents' effort, their pledge to do their best, and that the kids never forget that they are loved.

We'll see.